As a caveat - I reflected on and wrote out my word of the year at the beginning of the year. It is now a good chunk into the month as I write this blog. How long has it been on my need to write it out list? Waaaaay too long. Is it time to get more consistent in my explorations of writing and self? Oh, yeah. For sure. Have things happened recently that would require a not-business-as-usual response? Yes. That’s coming in a different space. This is the blog that I was planning to write at the beginning of the year, before the bs of this week which requires a whole different level of reaction and contemplation, and want to respect that head space and feeling. So, grab some (still totally appropriate for the season because I’m not THAT late) hot chocolate and sit for a spell with me.
(Sourced from JillWellington on Pixabay)
I gave up on resolutions a few years back. I was one of those who was GREAT at making resolutions. Would you like to know just how great I was at keeping them?
Sound of deafening silence
Suffice it to say, I gave it up finally. Being a miserable second a hot second into a new year just didn’t seem like the best possible way to kick off what is supposed to be a hopeful new beginning.
My word for the year last year was, “Align.”
Let’s back it up a hot second. If you’re unsure why a word of the year exists… the theory basically is, deep dive details depending on who you follow or what blog you read, you let the word help guide your year, let it help you really dial in to what you need to work on. So, it’s not a specific resolution where you’re going to become skinny because you ate a salad or grow a pair because you’re going to make this the year of, “NO!” instead of the year of, “YES!”
Did I follow this theory in spades last year?
Searches for ANYBODY to make a sound
Exactly. But, do I feel like a miserable failure? No. There’s always the shoulds behind the theories of everything, but I find that having a guidepost word helps me feel as though I’m still a work in progress versus needing to be a picture of perfection. I did better at working on me last year. I drilled down on my resume for my professional life. I took a chance on an amazing friend to work through health issues. I stood up for myself in multiple different relationships. I realized just how much I value and enjoy writing, having been told through the years that I’m actually quite good at it (granted, by people who are biased in their love for me, but they’re also not the type to give compliments for shits and giggles). And through all this, I really did start to dial in on what it means for ME to be aligned… even if it wasn’t totally intentional.
Which leads me to this year. I want to build on last year. Because I do feel as though I have a VERY strong base in what I want and need to be aligned, even though there are still details I need to work out, I do know I can move forward with a new word. But, it was also important to me, due to those details that need to be worked out, that I honor the word I didn’t quite commit to last year, because I didn’t quite fully commit to myself last year.
RELENTLESS.
This year, the word of my year, is to be relentless. Relentless in pursuit of my professional goals. Relentless in pursuit of building my writing muscle. Relentless in pursuit of my health - which does not mean being skinny, to be very clear, but more on that some other time. Relentless in my pursuit of slowing down my brain and honoring not just quiet, but silence. Relentless in my pursuit to re-create my space to suit my needs. I should say my family’s needs, but let’s be real on who’s boss here. Relentless in who even knows what will pop up.
This does not mean to be inflexible. If there’s one thing teaching has taught me - it’s how to have a game plan, watch it go up in flames and having to just make it work. It simply means knock off the willy nilly bs stories and excuses I’ve allowed myself to engage in and remind myself of the possibilities before me, of the changes I can make to make my life the best possible one, which ultimately affects those around me.
So. No judgements here if resolutions work for you. Or if you love making them and watching them prance away in the sunset (totally not looking at you diet resolution while eating a jug of Ben and Jerry’s). But, if you want to do something just a little different, to honor the potential that is a new year, then join me in making a word of the year. No idea how? I can share how I did it and I can direct you to the sites I used. Or. You could just Google it, if the thought of chatting with me about deep and vulnerable things sounds like something that would make your hot chocolate come right on back up.
Whatever you do, or however you do it, here’s to hoping you have whatever kind of year you wish to have.